You always go back.

I just read through the last few pages of blogs I have written... wow, a lot has changed in the last year or so. I have changed, my surrounds have changes, and the people around me have changed. David and I broke up about a year ago... big change from the last few entries! Anna and I are living together. Lilly turned two years old this summer (still the cutest puppy ever though!). I am progressing at work and studying for a CPCU designation. When I sit back and think about the last year... I have accomplished a lot and sustained through troubling times. I dug the follow out from a previous quote....

"For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. but there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. so treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one. Happiness is a journey, not a destination ... "

 -souza

This is a huge struggle for me... to be present NOW... and not looking forward towards something else where I will finally be happy when a certain goal or time is reached. I don't want to miss out on all the good things that are happening around me because I am too pre occupied with something else.

Anna and I are going out to Lost Maples with the puppies to hike and take pictures. I am excited. We have not had the chance to just get out into nature in awhile. I am starting my new work schedule this monday (4 ten hour days, thursday/st/sun off). I am going to go to the barn on thursdays and saturdays.... I cannot afford to ride as much as I have been without putting more hours of work in. I have been working with a horse name Dooley ... I am the only one working with him so I am feeling slightly guilty about this cut back... I may need to reconsider this plan.

Wade Bowen - Perfect Silence

I often wonder in my mind
If I’ve made a mistake
Cause your soft spoken spirit
Seems to have had all it can take

Then you look at me and smile
And that’s all you have to do
Your eyes tell me everything
And I no longer worry about you

I love to dream about you
And how quiet you love to be
Girl your perfect silence
Is perfect to me

I watch you walk into a room
You never have too much to say
I guess it’s in the way you move
Girl it just carries me away

I may never know why
Why you happened to me
I may never understand
How you set me free

I must have done something right
To get to stare at you everyday
All my hopes, dreams and love
The things you ask for when you pray

You captured all that I am
Mind and body and soul
The way that you do everything
Without even saying a word

I may never know why
Why you happened to me
I may never understand
How you set me free

Yea girl your perfect silence
is perfect to me

He found my song :)

Thank God tomorrow is Friday... I love friday because I have the whole weekend infront of me and it just feels good. The best friday after work activity is cleaning/laundry/getting organized.... i can't wait.... its cathartic in a big way for me.

I rode tonight. It went pretty well, I need to get back in shape... bleh.

.... I think its time to snuggle in with a book.

We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be.

C.S. Lewis

Well, what a day.

I have been working at my current real world job for four months now... and thankfully things are settling down and a routine is in place. The next few months will still be crazy with licensing in February and advanced auto after that... but, I like where I am.

although... I did have to fork over a wad of money for various bills this evening.... it just isn't any fun to pay for things like car maintenance, insurance, phone bills, and power... I want to spend money on fun things like puppy toys or picture frames! Oh well, thats life for yah.

I don't want to get too excited... but, it looks like David may have some new job opportunities coming up ... *praying for one to come through*